by SHIVAM JI
Wars, insurgencies, floods, an economy in the doldrums, and now dengue. If Pakistan is not a “failed state,” some credit must go to the Pakistani sense of humour.
There’s been terrible out break of Dengue fever in Lahore. 39 have died and the toll keeps rising – it was 36 when I began collecting the material for this post. Sohaib Gulbadan tweets: “My Hizb-ut-Tahrir friend is sharing articles suggesting dengue outbreak in Lahore is a CIA strategy. Acha.”
Perhaps it is in response to that sort of stuff that Haseeb Asif writes this hilarious blog post:
It bites at the break of dawn and at the uh, what is an acceptable verb to accompany dusk? It bites at the break of dawn and the mending of dusk? It bites at the break of dawn and the gluing together of dusk? Nah, not feeling it, great chief Passing Wisdom say, when in doubt, try synonyms. Break of dawn and…snap of dusk?…crack of dusk?…multiple hairline fracture of dusk? Great chief Passing Wisdom a jerk, call Passing Wind from now.
Start over. Engaging Urdu mode.
Dengue ka machar Shara’i machar hai. Yeh Fajr aur Maghrib ke waqt kaat ta hai. Baqi din nahin kaat ta. Baqi din Roza rakhta hai. Jin logon ki tangein aur bazoo nangi hon, unko pehle kaat ta hai. Parda daaron ko nahin kaat ta. Burqa posh khawateen ko nahin kaat ta. Uski aik waja shayid yeh bhi hai ke burqe ke ander se humeisha khatoon nahin nikalti, Maulvi bhi baramad hojate hein. Maulvion ko bhi nahin kaat ta, kyunke Mualvi ulta isse kaat lete hein. [Must read – apologies to those who can’t read Urdu in Roman script.]
Kafila for more
(Thanks to Robin Khundkar; his note: “Must read. Complete article along with TV clips can be accessed via the link above. Sad but FUNNY!“